Please read some of the stories and experiences that have been kindly shared with us.
Looking back, I hadn’t realised how the cancer diagnosis, chemotherapy and side-effects of the treatment had taken over my life and how anxious I had become. I thought I was coping, but was concerned that I was becoming a ‘burden’ to my family and friends. My daughters, family and friends have been amazing and so supportive, but I felt it was important to do something on my own and regain some independence.
The unknown became reality and I was overwhelmed with emotions. At first the pragmatic response, almost instinct kicks in, but as time passed and my energy was less needed in the duty of executor of estate, I could find way for my emotions. I have discovered so much, so much about grief, myself and counselling. I am proud that now my journey includes supporting and fundraising such an inspirational, crucial and vital charity and local asset.
My father-in-law died just over three years ago in the October and then my very close friend died in the March, so within five months we had lost both of them and spookily in the same room at the hospice. It was all very close together and it hit me like a bolt of lightning
Counselling isn’t something you necessarily want to do, I certainly didn’t. It could be two weeks or two months down the line, and you realise how much of an impact it has. Taking that first step is the hardest part. Talking to those around you is ok and they can help you take that first step but sometimes it’s difficult to talk to people who know you. That’s the good thing about counselling, this person has never met you, they aren’t going to judge you, they see you as a completely new person.
My name is Ben and I came for counselling with We Hear You as unfortunately my father passed away in late 2014. I came into contact with We Hear You via my school who had a link with We Hear You and were providing counselling services to the school at that time.
I was diagnosed with breast cancer in March 2018. Previously to that my dad was diagnosed with bowel cancer when I was 20, and heartbreakingly passed away a year later. Over the following years my aunt and cousin also both had breast cancer, so unfortunately the disease has been part of our lives for a long time. However, getting your own diagnosis hits you differently.
I’d wake up in the middle of the night just thinking. You go to bed thinking about it and then suddenly something would happen, a thought would come into your mind and you’d think the worst.
I felt the counselling helped me a lot. It felt good to do it. I stopped for a little bit as I felt better, but after my Grandpa died I came back for more sessions with Ruth. I kind of feel like a new person. I used to get quite stressed out and worry a lot, I now find it a lot easier to deal with difficult situations.
I think it’s really healthy to talk about it but I don’t want to speak to my friends and family because I think, ‘who wants to listen to me?’ I often think back to how I was before my mum died and I can’t remember the person I was. Because you just change. You can’t explain how you change but you change.
I think when you shut down your emotions other unwanted emotions surface and I think that’s what happened with me. To kind of hold it all together, I put a lid on things and I don’t think that’s very healthy.
I came across We Hear You and the counselling there was so helpful. My counsellor didn’t just sit there and say you’ve done amazing she asked about the relationships I had with people around me and my feelings about the cancer.